What’s in a Name?

I outed myself to a couple of friends at work today. Not in a big way – it was relevant to our conversation so I just threw into the dialogue that I’d had fertility treatments to conceive. I’m not particularly secretive about this, so it’s really no big deal. Except that it left me feeling uncomfortable.

The thing is, I always feel like a fraud when I use the word “infertile” to describe myself. I have a child, after all, so can I really be considered infertile?

But how else do I describe myself? Somehow calling myself infertile feels disrespectful to all those men and women still in the trenches, disrespectful to those who struggled much harder and longer than I did.

But it also feels disrespectful of me to ignore that part of my life. I mean, in a way I earned the right to use that word. I paid my dues in tears.
What word do you use to describe your IF status? Or, put another way, in your opinion what does it take for someone to be considered “infertile”?



Filed under Infertility

2 responses to “What’s in a Name?

  1. I have a friend who had one kid and it took her 3 long years to have another and she struggled with this too. I think she just told people she had “unexplained infertility” because that’s what the doctors called it. People were always like “At least you have one kid!” which I’m pretty sure drove her nuts, but she kept her cool.

    I think you can take whatever title you want, I doubt the Fertility Police will be coming by 🙂

    • Tio

      OMG, now I’m going to have nightmares about being arrested by the fertility police! I never even knew they existed. Thanks so much, Kara 😉